6 Tips on How Not to Say No to Your Child

Nobody likes hearing the word “no,” and that is especially true for children. With the word “no” can come tantrums, upset, and anger. It usually results in a power struggle and battle that no one really wants to have. Below are 6 tips that can help you avoid using the dreaded “no” word eliminating any battles that might follow, as well as, helping keep the peace between your child and you.

 6 Alternatives to Saying “No”:

1. Offer Choices. Instead of just telling your child “no,” give them choices to pick from. If your child asks to have cake for a snack and you would prefer he have something healthy, tell him that for snack he can either have carrots or an apple. mother saying no to childIf he is not happy with those choices, let him know that he can either pick or you will choose for him. If he still has not made a choice, go ahead and pick one for him. Give your child the snack and ignore any tantrums or talk about not being happy with the snack.

2. Give an Explanation. If the answer is “no”, do not just say “no,” but supply an explanation for why we cannot do that or why it might not be a good idea. For example, if your child wants to watch a scary movie you can let them know that the movie may cause nightmares and is not appropriate for them, but they can pick a different movie to watch. Or if your child wants to play a game that is not at their age level, explain the reason they cannot play that now is because they are not old enough yet, but in a few years will be. Have them choose a different game to play.

3. Think Before You Talk. Rather than immediately blurting out “no,” think before you respond. Figure out why that is the answer and let your child know why what he/she wants/requests cannot happen at that time.

4. Offer it Later. There are times that your child might ask for something but unfortunately they cannot have it. For example, if your child asks for ice cream for breakfast, the appropriate response would be “no.” However, instead tell your child that we need to have something else for breakfast (provide choices: cereal, pancakes, eggs, etc.,) but after lunch we can have some ice cream.

5. Keep Track of Wants. If you have a child who is constantly asking for toys or other items, remind them of different holidays that may be approaching. Encourage your child to ask for those things for their birthday, Christmas, or other special occasions. This way you are not saying they can never have that, but helping them create a want/wish list.

6. Make a Deal. Provide opportunities for your child to earn the items they want. If you are in the store and your child asks for something, instead of saying “no,” make a deal with them. Tell your child that she can get the Barbie Doll if she helps load and empty the dishwasher for a week or your son can get the Nerf toy he wants if he keeps his room clean. Use these situations to help increase your child’s responsibility around the house or with schoolwork.

In the beginning, it might be hard to catch yourself from just blurting out “No!”.  However, keeping these helpful tips in mind will aid in deescalating potential problems that usually occur from that response. And remember practice makes perfect!

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Supporting Your Child To Make Friends | Pediatric Therapy Tv

In today’s webisode, our  Marriage and Family Counselor gives us some wonderful take away tips on what to do when your child tells you he/she has no friends.

In This Video You Will Learn:

  • When and how to listen to your child’s social problems
  • How to respond to your child
  • What questions to ask your child
  • Suggestions and tips to help your child be more social

Video Transcription:

Announcer: From Chicago’s leading experts in pediatrics to a worldwide
audience, this is Pediatric Therapy TV, where we provide experience and
innovation to maximize your child’s potential. Now your host, here’s Robyn.

Robyn: Hello and welcome to Pediatric Therapy TV. I’m your host, Robyn
Ackerman, and today I’m standing with marriage and family
counselor Beth Chung. Beth, can you tell us how to help children
make friends?

Beth: Sure. I think this is a really important question and one that I get
asked pretty often. In our previous segment of Pediatric TV, Dr.
Stasi was really talking about tailoring the treatment of
helping your child make friends to each child’s individual
strengths and growth areas and needs. Today I’ll just touch on
some general strategies, but I’d really encourage parents to
keep that tidbit in mind.

One really important strategy, I think, which is often
overlooked, is to really listen to your child. I think a lot of
times parents realize that their child is struggling when he or
she comes to their parents and says, “Mom, dad, I have no
friends. No one wants to hang out with me.” It can feel really
tempting for parents to say, “No, that’s not true. I’m sure you
have tons of friends,” or, “Who cares what other kids think?”
It’s a way to reassure their child, but really it can minimize
your child’s concerns and prevent them from coming to you in the
future.

Something that I would suggest is something as simple as, “That
must be really hard,” or, “I bet it feels really tough when
you’re picked last in gym. I can understand why you might feel
like you have no friends,” even if you may feel differently,
because as soon as your child feels heard and accepted, you can
move on to some problem solving. This is a really great way to
help your child to feel more empowered.

Asking open-ended questions such as, “One possible reason is
that you don’t have friends, which is why you’re alone on the
playground. What else could it mean?” Coming up with suggestions
such as, “Well, you’re new in school and the kids might have
some other friends, and they might be shy to ask you to play,”
or, “Maybe they don’t know that you want to play with them,” are
some good suggestions to offer.

Another really good open-ended question is, “How can you show
that you want to be friends?” Coming up with a list of concrete
skills, such as asking to join in a game, asking someone to play
a game with them, saying hello, or complimenting are strategies
that your children can practice at home. You can make it fun and
role play with your kids. If you’re driving to the playground,
you can say, “All right, Carrie. Today we’re going to go to the
playground and if you see two girls playing house together, how
can you ask them to play? What are two things you can do?” This
can really help your child to feel empowered.

Those are some strategies that I’d suggest. But again, it’s
really important to reach out to the school, the teachers, the
principal, the social worker, as Dr. Stasi mentioned in our
previous segment, to really tailor this to each child’s unique
needs and growth areas.

Robyn: Thank you so much, Beth, and thank you to our viewers. And
remember, keep on blossoming.

Announcer: This has been Pediatric Therapy TV, where we bring peace of
mind to your family with the best in educational programming. To
subscribe to our broadcast, read our blogs, or learn more, visit
our website at LearnMore.me. That’s LearnMore.me.

How To Tie A Shoe Part 2 | Pediatric Therapy Tv

IN TODAY’S WEBISODE, A PEDIATRIC OCCUPATIONAL THERAPIST SHOWS US THE  SECOND PART IN TEACHING CHILDREN “HOW TO TIE THEIR SHOES”.   CLICK HERE TO READ A BLOG WITH HOW TO STEPS ON SHOE TYING:

Click here to watch part 1 of the How To Teach Shoe Tying Video

In This Video You Will Learn:

  • The step by step guide of teaching a child How To Tie a Shoe

Video Transcription:

Announcer: From Chicago’s leading experts in pediatrics to a worldwide
audience, this is Pediatric Therapy TV, where we provide experience and
innovation to maximize your child’s potential. Now your host, here’s Robyn.

Robyn: Hello and welcome to Pediatric Therapy TV. I’m your host, Robyn
Ackerman. In today’s segment, Marissa Edwards, pediatric
occupational therapist, will be showing us how to teach tying a
shoe. Marissa?

Marissa: Hi. This is part two of “Teaching Your Child How To Tie Their
Shoes.” The story that I use is “The Pirate Story” and I’m going
to go through that story with you right now. You can also find
this on the ADVANCE for Occupational Therapists website.

We start with the laces separated and we say, ‘X marks the
spot’. Then we have to put the key inside the treasure chest,
and we have to hurry up and lock it tight because the pirates
are coming. Then we find an island because we need to bury our
treasure.

We find an island, and we have to walk around the island to make
sure there are no pirates on the island. Then we take our shovel
– there are no pirates, by the way – we take our shovel, we dig
into the island, and then we have to bury it really, really
deep. And that’s it.

Robyn: Thank you, Marissa, and thank you to our viewers. And remember,
keep on blossoming.

Announcer: This has been Pediatric Therapy TV, where we bring peace of
mind to your family with the best in educational programming. To
subscribe to our broadcast, read our blogs, or learn more, visit
our website at LearnMore.me. That’s LearnMore.me.

To watch more Pediatric Therapy TV Webisodes Click Here!